I wrote this poem expressing my love for chocolate. I was hoping to get constructive criticism, so tell me what you think?
“Why?” I ask, “Why must you torture me the way that you do?”
Tempting you are, but I must save you till my weekend delight.
It is you that I chose over the raspberry-filled, caramel-dipped, and
lemon-glazed bites, so now you must wait for your grand tasting night.
I see you sitting there with your flaky-pecan gems
glancing at me in sweet desperation. And I know you are anxious
from your brown-dripping sweat,
Tempting you are, but I must save you till my weekend delight.
It is you that I chose over the raspberry-filled, caramel-dipped, and
lemon-glazed bites, so now you must wait for your grand tasting night.
I see you sitting there with your flaky-pecan gems
glancing at me in sweet desperation. And I know you are anxious
from your brown-dripping sweat,
but cocoa-kissed truffle just hold one more day,
then you could melt away into your paradise cave.
All through the night I thought about you and the day of your birth.
The two sticks of butter, 27 chocolate kisses, the 1 cup of flour,
¼ cup of cocoa, some droplets of sugar, and teaspoon of vanilla
extract made a divine little bunch, but you were unique with your
white-chocolate chip chunk.
By mid of next day I hurried to your royal-blue-foiled bedding
and savored my view. Round and chubby, russet and sound, your
cocoa-kissed body rolled into my mouth with tender and love. The warmth
of my palette felt your silk-textured skin and took your soul into mine.
Though part of you was still present as your white-speckled coat left a
powdered trail around my lips;
not even my black shirt could serve to disguise.
then you could melt away into your paradise cave.
All through the night I thought about you and the day of your birth.
The two sticks of butter, 27 chocolate kisses, the 1 cup of flour,
¼ cup of cocoa, some droplets of sugar, and teaspoon of vanilla
extract made a divine little bunch, but you were unique with your
white-chocolate chip chunk.
By mid of next day I hurried to your royal-blue-foiled bedding
and savored my view. Round and chubby, russet and sound, your
cocoa-kissed body rolled into my mouth with tender and love. The warmth
of my palette felt your silk-textured skin and took your soul into mine.
Though part of you was still present as your white-speckled coat left a
powdered trail around my lips;
not even my black shirt could serve to disguise.
My inspiration.....
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